Confession: I’m Struggling

there is always a bright side

To be honest, since my birthday two weeks ago, I have been struggling to eat on my personal plan. On the third, I got sick with some kind of cold that my nephews had and then last Sunday I ended up with an ear/sinus infection because of it and have been on an antibiotic since then. I’m still at the tail end of this thing and so far it hasn’t been too awful, all things considered, but it is exhausting… especially with all of my responsibilities and stresses, the chaos of everyday life. My nephews are still sick as well but on the tail end of theirs. This week my parents both got the cold complete with infections as well and my mom has sounded awful, but is now starting to sound and feel better which is great. Plus I’ve been babysitting a lot more hours the past couple weeks as well, and many other things going on that I couldn’t even begin to list here.

I’m not complaining, life is still absolutely beautiful and God continues to bless me left and right. My faith in Him is growing and I just love life. Even trials in my life are something for me to celebrate because I know they are teaching me something, or allowing for growth mentally or emotionally. So I am actually glad for each trial and have been learning to take things as they come more… However, I feel tired and run down, and I have been eating way too much junk and ate over my calories for five days straight in the past week. I don’t regret it because I still burned more than I ate (according to my Fitbit), and I decided to take a “lax” approach with my food because I didn’t want to add even more stress on top of everything else.

That all said, I do need to clean up my act and move forward. Today I’m beginning to refocus on my eating. I have a migraine and an upset stomach, probably from a variety of factors, which makes my appetite not as strong but makes exercise harder. I also babysat for 15 hours yesterday on less than four hours of sleep so I’m still a bit tired even after getting great-for-me sleep last night. So today’s goal is not to eat a bunch of junk, to get all my water in, and to stay inside my calorie range. Tomorrow I will try hard to hit 10K steps and I WILL make it to the gym. I’m feeling better overall and I need to get back to the gym, after all I’m paying for it and I need to build my strength back up again.

I’m human, I slip. I struggle. Almost on a daily basis I struggle with something, sometimes as small as patience or energy. Sometimes like lately it’s that and my eating. I just do what I can and move forward. I focus on the positives of each day, and try not to stress too much. It’s easier said than done. I’m a natural worrier, but I’m learning.

So today instead of indulging in something unhealthy at lunch time, which was super tempting, I had a bowl of oatmeal with a tablespoon of brown sugar mixed in. It tasted good, hit the spot, and was healthier than what I wanted to grab.

oats with strawberries

Obviously that is not my oatmeal but you get the point. Each step in the right direction adds up, no matter how small it is. So the deal is to keep moving forward and not lose hope!

Why am I posting this? I want you all to know you’re not alone. Even someone as far into their journey as me has hard times with eating and exercise, or whatever else. It’s a lifetime journey but I also want you to know that there is so much more than our struggles and slip ups. Each challenge helps us grow, each challenge teaches something, and each challenge allows for opportunities we may not have had otherwise. Even before I found my faith in God, I believed this wholeheartedly and I hope you do as well!


P.S. I want to let you know that I edited the captions on yesterday’s Caption This Photo post, so head on over there and check that out if you’d like to.

3 thoughts on “Confession: I’m Struggling

  1. You’re doing so well Bonnie. We are all just human, and as we know, it is dealing with the ups and downs that makes us winners eventually, not being super human and perfect every day. You look fantastic, and as long as you are looking forwards, you will go in the right direction x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah that’s what I want to poetry. We are all human and we all have slip ups or times we feel down, it’s only natural. It’s hard to realize we aren’t alone if we don’t have someone sharing with us in some way.


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